Photo by Nicola Styles on Unsplash

2017 is the year Alkira was born.

My older sister moved into our parents’ house when he was born. She needed an extra pair of hands to take care of Alki. She was moving into my room, to be exact. And that’s when she scolded me.

I remember it went something like this: ‘Ini apa iniii segala bobodolan di kamar u?? Punya barang tu di pake napa?? Ada body wash dll di kamar mandi tapi masih full?? Lo beli makanan juga dibiarin aja di kulkas sampe basi apa gimana???’

I didn’t realize it at the time. Waktu itu cuma masuk kuping kiri keluar kuping kanan aja omelan Pipo. Only recently, at the end of 2020, did I realize what she’s saying. She was right.

Why did I buy things and then keep them for ‘special occasions’ instead of using them right away?

I didn’t buy things I didn’t need out of boredom. I genuinely wanted the food I stored in the fridge or the Neutrogena body wash I kept in my bathroom. Jadi bukan “Gw beli tapi sebenernya gak butuh,” tapi lebih ke “Gw beli tapi barangnya gw sayang-sayang buat ‘nanti’ sampai akhirnya malah gak kepake.”

In her TED talk, Gillian Dunn explains that accumulating and not using our stuff is usually driven by two emotions. The first is, “I don’t have enough”. And the second is “I’m not enough”.

That prompted me to take a long hard look at myself. Is that what I really think? And if it is (not), what can I do to change it?

Let me be clear: the only thing WE ALL should save for later is our money. Pay yourself first. Always. After that, you are free to spend your money buying the things you need and want AND enjoy them right now.

Joyce Marter, a licensed psychotherapist, said that many of us pin our happiness on future events, achievements or desired outcomes when peace and joy — and quite frankly, our lives — are in the present moment.

Don’t buy that lovely dress for ‘later’. Don’t tuck away that nice perfume on your closet for a ‘special occasion.’ Don’t keep that expensive pesto sauce for ‘another day.’ Every day is special. You ARE special. You deserve to have it and/or use it right now.

Why wait for that imaginary one day that may never come?

In case you forgot: kita gak butuh izin dari siapapun lho untuk nikmatin hidup sekarang, untuk pakai barang-barang yang kita beli dengan uang yang udah susah payah kita kerja untuk dapetin. We DID save (or invest) first pulak.

Ngapain beli makanan atau barang tapi cuma untuk disayang-sayang jadi pajangan? Nanti malah basi atau out of style.

Gw beli buat diri gw sendiri kok. Untuk nyenengin diri gw sekarang. My present self is enough. I do deserve these nice things now. Bukan besok, bukan nanti, bukan kapan-kapan.

Somewhere between 2017 - 2020 something clicked; something changed my mindset and subsequently how I treat my stuff. Now I eat my salmon sashimi seconds after I bought it (no more keeping it in the fridge until whenever), I use everything I own anytime I want, ‘cause now I know I am enough, and I’ll always have enough.

You deserve the best. Every single day. Whether it’s the things you own, or how you’re treated. Always remember that ♥